Surving the Holidays with Emotional Pain

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Surving the Holidays with Emotional Pain

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My grandmother used to say, “The holidays come and go and take a lot of people with them.”

For a long time, I used to think those were “just words,” until the keen insight this statement revealed about our life experiences struck me personally.

One of my biggest life lessons happened eight years ago, when my dad passed very suddenly just fifteen days before Christmas. My mom’s phone call alerting me of his death is still etched in my heart and mind. From time to time, the memory resurfaces triggered by a variety of sensory experiences that we all get exposed to in our everyday life.

We all know the cardinal rule: we are born and one day we will die. If this happens during the holiday season, we must work to expand our consciousness, by choosing to grow through the pain of loss.

Everything that is happening to us is being absorbed on both the conscious and subconscious levels. When we become aware of all the many levels in life it helps us better understand the grieving process. Knowing what triggers our depression, or emotional pain, gives us the ability to become more powerful in our lives.

For many people, the holidays can be extremely painful as we remember not only those we have lost, but also how the life we may have wished for didn’t turn out.

We must remember that we live in a free-will planet and you must decide to either be a volunteer or a draftee in dealing with whatever pain you are facing. When you choose to be a volunteer you become open and receptive to the growth an experience offers. As a draftee, many people go through pain, literally, kicking and screaming, not wanting to change or even accept circumstances they cannot control.

Celine Dion’s song, Because You Loved Me, still connects with the inner layer of pain around my heart concerning my dad’s death. That song played at his funeral, and hearing it some eight years later, can still throw me into emotional pain if I am not extremely careful.

Once while donating blood, the song was playing in a room filled with volunteers like me who were hooked up to IVs. The technician monitoring my blood withdrawal looked shocked when she saw I was softly crying. Knowing about the emotional trigger of this song, gave me the insight to not only accept, but even acknowledge, the process to her. I made a conscious choice to relax and decided that my giving blood at this time was no accident, it reminded me of one of God’s greatest gifts—our ability to give and receive love.

©2008 Sheree Franklin. Sheree is a life coach and entrepreneur who specializes in intuitive coaching. Visit her web site at or contact
[email protected]

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